nobody cares

so its happened again...i have been let down by some of my said friends. tonight was a true test to see if they would give a shit if i was gone or not and they didn't no one even noticed that i wasn't there and then when i did see someone they didn't say anything to me. he said oh I'm surprised u weren't there tonight and then carried on with his conversation. in doing that it really hurt me. to know that if i was missing most people wouldn't notice, give 2 shits, or come and look for me. it hurts to know that. if i had been dead on the side of the road, been being brutally murdered or raped by someone no one would even notice. aside from the fact of no one noticing i was gone i got my heart stomped on again in finding out that the guy i thought i really liked doesn't like me because people are to fucking nosey and have to stick there opinion and there comments where they are not needed and where they should stay out. i hate when people do that. they intervene where they shouldn't because in the end they fucked up everything. if she hadn't have gone and said anything i probably could have changed his mind but no she had to go and say something to him and she had to go and take matters into her own hands where the matters never should have been. in the end i was asked by him if i had talked to her about what had been talked about via texting and i had heard about it earlier that night. when i found out i could have killed someone. i mean really are we in the 3rd grade again where you go up to the person and ask if they like your friend or not because i thought we were in college and that we didn't do that anymore and that people didn't stick there nose where it doesn't belong.
all in all i hate people and have decided to keep all of my feelings in and show no emotions anymore and that i am done talking to people because what ever i say always gets back to the person and it always happens in a negative way. i always get burned.
I am going to become the crazy old cat lady who absolutely hates cats and rides one of those power chairs everywhere and has no friends when I'm old and decrepit.